Posted in after the diagnosis, care for the caregiver, Caregiving, living with chronic illness, Living with Illness

How Do You Walk in the World?

Welcome to Caregiver Fiday!!!

So I’ve been giving some thought to how you walk in the world as a caregiver.  There are so many opportunities to display different modes of operating and I will talk about some “archetypes” over the next couple of weeks to focus the discussion, but today I have two visuals.  Do you walk this world as a duck or a sponge?

Let’s get real for a moment.  After you read this entry, take a couple of minutes to really reflect, even meditate on this question.  First the duck.  As they say, “water rolls off a ducks back”.  In people terms that means that you don’t let anything get to you.  You may present as stoic to the world, unphased and unnerved.  Others may view you as a bit cold or uncaring, even though that’s the furthest thing from the truth.

Then we have the sponge…pick any color you want to be.  The sponge absorbs every nuance of emotion.  They are the ultimate receivers of the world and are often overwhelmed by their lot in life as a caregiver.  They are so empathic that it takes over their emotional world.

Which is better?  That’s really not for me to say, but for you to understand which works better for you given your own emotional composition and your personal circumstances.  I think in a perfect world, the ideal would probably be a combination of the two.  Having the capacity to let the inane slide past you and absorbing the important aspects of providing compassionate care to another. 

Trust me, balance is not easy to achieve.  It takes a lot of practice, maybe even takes a practice (more to be revealed).  The secret to any relationship is not to be the iron maiden and allow nothing in, nor melt into a pool of emotional mayhem leaving everyone without a safety net.

How do you balance your roles as a caregiver?  Do you feel balanced or do you fall more toward one end of the continuum?


I've lived my life in service to others. I'm focused on mental health and how it impacts our relationships, culture, and society. Through creative expression and narrative I believe we can impact change.

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