Posted in Caregiving, Uncategorized

Do You See a Pattern?

Welcome to Caregiver Friday!

I’m a textile artist so I’m always intrigued by patterns.  I find interesting patterns in magazines, clothing, and nature.  Now let’s take the idea of patterns to a different level and look at the patterns we live or re-live in our lives.  As a psychotherapist for the past 20+ years I can tell you patterns are the client’s personal gold mine.  These patterns hold lots of information and can once acknowledged and addressed can change your life forever.

What pattern am I talking about?  The pattern of caregiving.  Don’t get me wrong I believe with all my heart that caregiving is a gift, it’s noble, and is a sign of your love and affection.  I also believe that people who become caregivers often have a long history of caregiving.

I’ll give you some personal examples to make my point.  My sister-in-law is in Canada (she lives in Texas)  because her father had open heart surgery yesterday.  She’s the anointed caregiver.  I love my brother with all my heart, but I can assure you that I know I’ve already been anointed the caregiver for our parents if and when the time comes they need that extra attention or support.

It would be easy if we could simply find the caregiving gene and blame it on that, but that doesn’t seem to  be the case.  So are we groomed to be caregivers from an early age?  What is it that put the neon sign over our head anointing us the caregiver?  I believe that what others pick up on is our level of sensitivity.  A good caregiver is in tune to the energy surrounding the patient as well as their own vibrations.  They almost have this knack for anticipating the needs of others and that can be witnessed from a very early age.  A butt load of compassion doesn’t hurt and that can be witnessed early on in childhood.

I don’t know whether it’s possible to turn the caregiving frequency off or whether you would ever want to turn it off; but knowing it exists is important.  Understanding your desire and  maybe even need to be of service is like a beacon to those in need of caregiving.  I focus on health challenges, but the caregiving role can be found in a multitude of arenas.

All I ask is that you pay attention to the patterns and make all your decisions from a conscious vantage point.  Save yourself a lot of pain and suffering by being mindful of when you become a caregiver, how often you become a caregiver and what role caregiving plays in your own life.


I've lived my life in service to others. I'm focused on mental health and how it impacts our relationships, culture, and society. Through creative expression and narrative I believe we can impact change.

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